Career Counseling From Mommy Dearest

I have a recurring conversation with folks.  It goes something like this--

FOLKS:  I really give you credit. 

ME:  Really?  Why?  

FOLKS:  Well I mean moving to L.A. with a baby and everything.  It probably wasn't easy leaving all of your family and the only state you've known with a baby.  I mean, with a baby, it has to be tough.  Right?  You have a baby AND you moved out here to struggle.  Wow.  I commend you.  

So like many things in my life, I took this extraordinary leap a little backwards I guess.  And it's hard to not question what life would be like if we were still in Chicago.  I'd see my family all the time!  Mr. Jarcy might have booked some more commercial work and performed in corporate gigs!  I'd be back to dog walking my good friend's pup pups or maybe even nannying her infant!  I'd have a job at the improv theater to go back to no problem!  I'd see my family constantly!  I'd be shopping at Oakbrook with my own mama this very weekend if I were in Chicago!  Oh god, Chicago!!!  Yes, it's difficult to turn off that "what if" switch.  

But I can't stay there long.  It does me no good.  We're not there anymore.  We are here.  In Hollywood.  And it's hard to not question what the hell we're doing here.  We're 36 years old and have a baby!  The baby is nearing preschool age, how are we gonna pay for the baby to attend preschool?  Is there an expiration date on dreams?  Maybe once you turn 36 and have a baby you're supposed to relinquish those aspirations and find stable work!?  Everyone keeps talking about how this is the worst possible time to be an actor or writer out here!  Reality TV is taking over and all us creative types are getting squeezed out by Snookie!  Agents are tough to come by.  Managers are even tougher! You're nothin' without managers and agents!  Oh god, Hollywood!!!  Oh boy, yes, it's difficult to turn off that "this is reality" switch too. 

But here's the deal-- 

As far as I know there has NEVER been a time when it was said, "Oh you better get out to Hollywood!  You know they're giving actors a starring role on the show of their choosing just for showing up! Wanna sell a script?  EASY PEASY!  Just throw one together and collect two hundred thousand dollars!  As long as you get there by year's end, the opportunities are endless.  ENDLESS!"  

Nope, not true.  Even in the 20's Joan Crawford had to bust her ass.  I read on Wikipedia the following:

As MGM screenwriter Frederica Sagor Maas recalled, "No one decided to make Joan Crawford a star. Joan Crawford became a star because Joan Crawford decided to become a star." (I'm guessing no one wanted to make Frederica a star either but she decided to focus on Joan with that statement.)

Following in Joan Crawford's parenting practices would be ill-advised.  Following in her plight at stardom--whatever the hell that means--may not be so bad.